(Where you can marry yourself! Yes, really!)

Let’s talk about something that not enough couples know about—but totally should.

Did you know that in a handful of states, you can legally marry yourselves? Like, no officiant, no witnesses, no script—just the two of you, a couple of pens, and a lot of intention.

This beautiful option is called self-solemnizing, and it’s one of my favorite things to recommend to couples who want an elopement that’s fully centered around their covenant—not a performance or production.

So… What is Self-Solemnizing?

Self-solemnizing (sometimes called “self-uniting”) means that a couple can legally marry without an officiant or witness present. You don’t have to hire anyone, ask a friend to get ordained, or even have guests watching. You simply say your vows to each other and sign the license—just the two of you.

It’s a deeply intentional and powerful way to enter marriage. No distractions. No script. No stage. Just you two and the promise you’re making.

What States Allow Self-Solemnizing?

As of now, here’s where you can legally self-solemnize your marriage in the U.S.:

States Where Self-Solemnizing Is Legal:

• Colorado – the OG and most self-solemnizing-friendly state. You can even bring your dog to “sign” the license with a paw print!
• Washington, D.C.
• Pennsylvania
• Wisconsin – with some restrictions (you may need to specify a “non-religious” ceremony and sign a waiver)
• Nevada – in some counties under specific conditions
• California – with a special “non-clergy” marriage license
• Illinois – if you belong to a recognized religion or spiritual group that doesn’t require an officiant
• Kansas – similar to Illinois: allowed if part of a recognized religious/spiritual practice

Note: Laws change, so always double-check with the local clerk’s office before you finalize anything!

Why Self-Solemnizing is So Cool

Besides being legal in more places than you might expect, here’s why self-solemnizing is seriously worth considering:

1. It strips the day back to what matters most.

When it’s just you two exchanging vows without a third party leading, the moment becomes incredibly intimate and sacred.

2. You get total freedom.

No pressure to say things a certain way. No stage fright. No timelines. Just your words, your way.

3. It’s perfect for remote or adventurous elopements.

Want to get married on a mountaintop at sunrise? Or barefoot in the middle of the forest? You don’t need to bring an officiant along—just the license and your love.

4. It can still be beautifully documented.

Even without a traditional ceremony, your self-solemnizing elopement can be captured in a way that tells the full story—vows, emotions, details, and all the just-married joy.

Can You Still Include Friends or Family?

Absolutely. Self-solemnizing doesn’t mean you have to be alone—it just means that legally, you can be.

Some couples invite a few close loved ones to watch as they read their vows in a quiet clearing or on a windswept overlook. Others keep it completely private, then celebrate later with family and friends. The beauty is in the freedom to choose.

What You’ll Need

Every state’s requirements are different, but generally, to self-solemnize, you’ll need:

• Valid IDs
• A marriage license from the county clerk
• A plan to return the signed license by the deadline

Pro tip: In Colorado, you don’t need any witnesses at all—but you can have your dog or kid “sign” the license, which is maybe the cutest thing ever.

Final Thoughts

If you’re dreaming of a day that’s deeply meaningful, wildly personal, and refreshingly free from outside pressure—self-solemnizing might be the perfect fit.

It’s not just legal… it’s powerful. It’s sacred. And it gives you the space to really focus on your covenant, not a checklist.

If you’re curious about where you can self-solemnize, how to plan an elopement that honors your values, or how to get it all beautifully documented, I’d love to help you make it happen. This is your marriage, and it deserves to begin in a way that feels entirely you. Inquire at abbyreephotography.com !